For 5 years I was going full out with The Voices Of business - I was coaching 1:1 clients, running Voices programs both online and face to face + hosting & performing in live theatre shows.
I'm proud looking back on what was created, we ran 10 programs and produced 15 live event shows in that time with pretty much each event & show selling out.

Over the last couple of years I've spent a lot of time reflecting on the creative process, what fuels it and what kills it…

Self love for me now is:

• Showing up even when I don’t FEEL like it

• Sticking to my word

• Allowing my feelings to move through without judging or trying to fix/solve anything

• Not giving advice when I haven’t been asked for it

• Having a part time job

• Surrendering and stop thinking I know a better way

• Praying for god’s will, not mine

• Building a routine and structure that gives me time in nature each day

• Meditating and being still with myself….

I felt a bit deflated last night.

I'd planned to spend the day working on some Tik Tok videos, getting my suitcase of characters out of the basement actually felt symbolic of the fact that I've spent most of my time this past year in Tali - less interested in needing to expose my parts or vocalise them because they seemed pretty quiet.

But then getting the costumes out, it was like they were stale - I couldn't access the physicality, accent or voice as easily as I used to.

Cos it's a muscle, right? Like how can you expect if you haven't been to the gym in a while to bench press as many times as you used to.

It's crazy how much pressure and expectation I place upon myself sometimes….

It's a little dramatic I know, but let's be honest...us creatives do love a bit of drama😉

I want to share about an experience I had, that I haven't really been able to speak about until now.

You see, for years I was so reactive and gun-ho about personal development, bettering myself. And whilst there were elements of that that were healthy, the underlying desire to prove myself and 'be enough' led to some dangerous experiences.

Not so much in that my physical form was in danger, but what it did to my psyche, my emotional and spiritual world was quite traumatising.

I speak about it in a few of the shorter episodes on my podcast, because I believe it's a really important thing to become aware of when we're creative and we 'put ourselves out there'.

It takes vulnerability and courage to rock up at an audition, to share poetry, to sing in public, to dance on stage opening up to people's opinions and judgements of you...

For years I was so full of self doubt. I knew deep down that I was creative and passionate, but I was so afraid. So afraid of putting myself out there. So afraid of failure and being told I wasn’t in fact talented and should quit trying in the acting world.

So 5 years ago I took a leap of faith. I quit my job as a professional children’s entertainer and devoted my time to creating a one-woman show…